Pikes Party 2004 Song

To the tune of ---- "Old Man River" ---- By Ray

There's an odd lot that are known as Pikehands
A very odd lot it is plain to see
Aren't you all glad your sitting down there
Aren't you all glad that you're not me-ee

Old Men Pikehands
We're Old Men Pikehands
We don't do thinking
We just do drinking
And come home rolling
We come home rolling along

Got computers
And read the tutors
We've learnt to e-mail
We e-mail females
Can't stop us dreaming
We just keep dreaming along

Walking stick and zimmer frame
Tell me again I forgot your name
Watch that pension day get near
Bob's a little drunk and in trouble with Ver-aa
Bry gets weary, Pete's tum is seethin'
And Ray is grievin'
Can't keep his teeth in
But Old Men Pikehands
They just keep Piking along

Make a rude noise ev'ry step we totter
What do we know and what do we care?
We shall end up wearing knotted handkies
Tucking our shirts in our underwear-er

With rheumatism
We walk a slow mile
And now our phones are
The one thing mobile
But Old Men Pikehands
They just keep Piking along

We've no libido
We take Viagra
Forget twice nightly
It ain't Niagr'a
But Old Men Pikehands
They just keep Piking along

Ev'ry day we sweat and strain
Body all aching and racked with pain
Half an hour spent on the loo
We're too constipated to do a poo-ooo
Saw the doctor to get a tonic
Something chronic
But Old Men Pikehands
They just keep Piking along

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To the tune of ---- "The Young Ones" ---- By Ray

The Young Pikes
Don't forget the Young Pikes
For Young Pikes
Hold the Hand aloft
We're here now
We're not going away
For we're Young Pikes and Young Pikes are here to stay

We're Young Pikes
We're the fam'ly future
And Young Pikes
We will have our day
We don't have
One foot down the grave
We'll teach Old Pikes how a Pikehand should behave

Once in ev'ry lifetime
When you reach eighteen
When you hear midnight strike
You've grown up, you're a Pike

We're Young Pikes
We should stick together
For Pikes are
Brothers to the end
And some day
Though our years be few
Oh these Young Pikes will be Old Pikes just like you